Today I shot an elastic at my sister.  It was an experience reminiscent of poking a rhinoceros with a stick.  I regret nothing.

In other news, I’ve decided to become a pirate.  This career change may come as a surprise to some of you, but let it be known that those close to me have pinpointed my inclination toward piratesque endeavours.

I’ve done some research.  I’ve got a pretty credible contact in the medieval watercraft industry and he’s willing to sell me a gently used frigate for the low, low price of $700,000.  By this weekend I’ll be sailing the open seas, accosting Mediterrenean cruiseliners up, down, and sideways, relieving them of their valuables with swashbuckling suave.

I couldn’t be more excited.

But not to worry my children, for I will not abandon you.  My posts with continue with unrelenting regularity, doubtless more thrilling than ever before.

Until tomorrow.  Keep your friends close and your valuables closer.

Fun Fact of the Day: More than 60% of Americans believe stormy weather affects cloud computing.  Now you know.